Sunday, May 3, 2009

No you didn't!

...Continued from

The King was discussing a plan with his chief economic advisers to sponsor a golf tournament. His advisers weren't particularly enthused with the idea, but they were dealing with the King, and they had to tread lightly. The problem, as they saw it, was that the kingdom didn't stand to gain much, if anything, from a sporting venture, and could quite possibly lose big. The king wasn't listening to all the king's men, and protested that if Monaco could have a grand prix and Luxembourg a tennis tournament, why couldn't he have a golf tournament?

The queen, meanwhile, wasn't impressed with the king's latest idea either, but she wasn't going to say anything. Yet. After all, hadn't she always gotten her way with sufficient cajoling? But now was not the time for such antics. After all, her opinion hadn't even been asked yet. Not that she expected it to be asked. No, the queen rejoiced in an advisory role that was above the asking of opinion. She made her views be known in a far more subtle way than an outside observer, seeing her gross manners and corpulent build, would have ever believed possible.

The king followed his meeting with lunch. His wife, the queen, had ordered cheese omelets, and the king began to eat his with gusto. After a few investigatory bites of her own egg the queen asked, "And how was your morning, dear?"

The king, instantly on his guard following such a patently false opening, guardedly responded, "It was satisfactory." The queen hadn't been prepared for such a brilliant strategic move on the part of the king, and was nonplussed for a moment. Only for a moment of course-she hadn't become the queen by failing to respond to such provocative statements instantly. Girding her wits about her, the queen said, "Well, that's nice. Was anything accomplished?"

Shocked by this completely unexpected rejoinder, the king pondered his next move, but only for the briefest of periods of time. Less than ten seconds to be sure, but possibly a little more than five. Regardless, the king soon gathered his thoughts, and let loose with a barrage of astounding clarity, "Not too much. We discussed various options for making it through the current financial crisis, and we're all pleased with the progress we're making."

The queen was blown out of her boxers by this incredibly coruscating retort, and nearly gave up the fight. She didn't, of course, because she hadn't become the queen by giving up the fight. When the going got tough, the queen got nasty. "So what you're saying, dear, is that you're interested in improving the kingdom's financial well-being with a well-timed stimulus package designed to bolster our workforce and improve morale in both the public and private sector with a series of interventionist measures calculated to dig us out of the morass we've fallen into?"

The king felt that this conversation had gone too far, and he fell asleep. The queen finished his omelet, content in her victory.

To Be Continued...


bonne said...

oh good, it continues.

Just like a guy said...

Did you ever doubt it?

e said...


Just like a guy said...

I thought so.

Cheerio said...

wait, what about the queen's treachery? i cant believe they're engaging in normal breakfast battle as if that never happened!

Just like a guy said...

Life goes on. When you've grown a little older you'll learn to forgive and forget.