Tuesday, January 12, 2010

About sports

Soccer is the most superior of all sports.

Baseball is about as interesting as a game of paper-rock-and-scissors.

Both facts are objectively true.

96 comments:

Crawling Axe said...

subscribing

The Real Shliach said...

Both are also objectively false.

Crawling Axe said...

The burden of proof is on you.

The Real Shliach said...

Au contraire!

Crawling Axe said...

I have to prove your statement? Why, I'd rather prove e's statement!

The Real Shliach said...

Actually, that's not what my "on the contrary" referred to, but yes. Anyway, which statement did e make?

Crawling Axe said...

Wait for it.

The Real Shliach said...

You have too much faith in that boy.

Crawling Axe said...

Fine. Then I would rather prove anything he has said before.

The Real Shliach said...

Or you could prove your assertions in this post.

e said...

For some non-zero integers x, y, and z, and for some integer n greater than 2, the equation x^n+y^n=z^n has no solution.

Prove that, smarty pants.

Crawling Axe said...

Have you said that before?

I can prove what you wrote. I can prove it false.

The Real Shliach said...

This looks like a fascinating topic-please continue.

e said...

you can prove fermat's last theorem false? good luck with that.

e said...

AURGH!!!! I WANT TO KILL YOU MOTHERF*CKING ANONYMOUS INTRUDER BASTARD!!!!!!!!

Crawling Axe said...

Oh, I misread what you wrote. I thought you were being more devious and were asking me to prove the opposite of the theorem true.

Well, what can I say? I have the proof, but it’s too lengthy to fit in this here space. So, I am providing a link: azoy.

The Real Shliach said...

Don't worry e, I stomped him out.

Crawling Axe said...

Now the posterity will think both e and you are referring to me.

The Real Shliach said...

Not if they have access to our email they won't.

e said...

The problem was that I wrote "for some non-zero integers..." instead of writing "for any non-zero integers..."

Also, with the hypotheses I gave, the equation does have a solution, namely 1^n+1^n=1^n

So all in all, it wasn't much a challenge.

Crawling Axe said...

1^n+1^n=1^n?

e said...

Oh right. Mixed up addition and multiplication. (metaphorical tail between metaphorical legs.)

Crawling Axe said...

Somehow I feel you wouldn’t make such mistakes, if instead of numbers you used words.

For instance, you could have said: “Cubum autem in duos cubos, aut quadratoquadratum in duos quadratoquadratos, et generaliter nullam in infinitum ultra quadratum potestatem in duos eiusdem nominis fas est dividere cuius rei demonstrationem mirabilem sane detexi. Hanc marginis exiguitas non caperet.”

Crawling Axe said...

I also like how for goyim, the Math was, lehavdil, like Gemara for Yidden.

Diophantes with Rashi.

e said...

Well, if I had been approaching it graphically (which is what wordful paragraph does), i wouldn't have made that mistake.

e said...

Even symbolically, I shouldn't have made that mistake. it was a really silly mistake.

Dovid said...

What entertaining comments! Unfortunately, the post itself was complete codswallop. And this time, I'm not just saying that so I can use the word codswallop.
baseball>>>>>>soccer

The Real Shliach said...

I didn't know we allowed Dodgers fans to comment on this forum...

Crawling Axe said...

Does symbol >>>>> mean progress from a more boring sport to a more interesting one?

The Real Shliach said...

No, it means that baseball is far more compelling a spectacle than soccer.

Crawling Axe said...

If one enjoys watching a game of paper-rock-and-scissors, sure. I said as much in my post. Or poker. Or pool. Or golf.

The Real Shliach said...

Ahh, and now we get to the subject of the post itself. It's not objectively true, it's subjectively true. I, for example, happen to hold the opposite. Soccer is as interesting as watching paint dry.

Crawling Axe said...

You must have very active paint.

It is subjective if you don’t understand the rules and dynamics of soccer and have never played it yourself.

I have played both soccer and baseball. I have happened to watch both and heard people who love both describe it.

It’s like saying “playing Minesweeper is more interesting than learning Tosfos”.

The Real Shliach said...

Actually, my paint is particularly unappealingly boring.

It is subjective because that's what it is.

(I have played soccer, and indeed have watched it many times)

Soccer=Rashash. Baseball=Ayin Beis.

Crawling Axe said...

Listen sometimes to some Spanish- or Russian-speaking commentators of a soccer game. I have never heard anyone get so excited about a baseball game. People come with their families, eat hotdogs, drink beer, and discuss some boring statistics.

I understand why in America that is considered a fun activity. Cutting grass is also considered a fun outdoors activity in the US.

Crawling Axe said...

I don’t want to watch an athletic sport that is like Ayin Beis. If I wanted something like that, I’d watch a game of chess of Go.

I like a sport in which there is movement, dynamics and action. A sport is a model of a war battle.

The Real Shliach said...

Spanish and Russian announcers would get excited commentating about paint drying.

Crawling Axe said...

By the way, I have no problem with basketball. Although not as good as baseball, it’s quite an enjoyable sport to watch.

(Wait, wasn’t it invented by British or something? That would be a good explanation.)

The Real Shliach said...

Who is asking you to be an athlete?

Baseball is all about brains and brawn-soccer is about making broad generalizations to win a pointless argument.

The Real Shliach said...

Basketball is played professionally in the "National Boring Association".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Naismith

Crawling Axe said...

Nope. Soccer is about getting fun from the process, whatever the final score. Baseball is about statistics.

Crawling Axe said...

Getting fun? Having fun? Making fun?

One of those.

The Real Shliach said...

The process=running around for ninety minutes? Why not just go for track and field?

Dovid said...

TRS- no need to be bitter about the dodgers leaving for LA, that happened a long time ago. You can't blame them for leaving the miserable brooklyn weather for sunny CA.

CA- 1. How could a Russian find baseball boring? All the steroids and chess-like moves should keep you entertained. 2. Even if you find baseball boring, basketball and football are also far more entertaining that soccer. 3. > means "greater than". >>>>> means "far more entertaning".

Dovid said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Crawling Axe said...

Running around vs. running from one point of a square to another?

Dovid said...

How can anyone think basketball is boring?
How can anyone think soccer is entertaining?
Can we all agree that football is entertaining?

Crawling Axe said...

Well, I dislike football too, although I like rugby. I think my dislike of baseball and football has to do with lack of continuous action. Things aren’t flowing. Some action happens for a few seconds, and then you spend five minutes drinking beer, eating your hotdogs and discussing what just happened. I like that in chess. I don’t like that in sports.

I think that’s the main reason. For a while I thought it had to do with Americans. But even though I like an American crowd less than a European one, I don’t think I would enjoy a game of cricket either. And I do enjoy hockey and basketball, as I said.

Dovid said...

Well I guess I can live with agreeing with you on basketball and with TRS on baseball.

Crawling Axe said...

I can live with knowing that I am objectively right in my like and dislike of sports.

Crawling Axe said...

Btw, there is a reason why baseball is popular only in the US, Mexico and Japan (is it popular in Canada?), while soccer is popular internationally, across cultures, climates and gastronomic preferences.

The Real Shliach said...

Dovid: what do I care for Brooklyn? I hate (most things) New York. I was just trying to find out if you were a Dodgers or an Angels fan.

CA: you're just an anti-American snob (almost as bad as e with his comments), that's all. I think we should contact the ICE about you.

The Real Shliach said...

And let me guess, dovid, you're not a clippers fan, eh?

Dovid said...

I'm not embarassed by the clippers team, they've had great teams, they just have a horrible organization, horrible ownership. When you're not a fan of basketball and you buy a team just because you can, it's not right. When Griffin starts playing next year they'll be a playoff team. If the organization does a move with the millions of dollars they have under the cap, they will be a championship team.

Crawling Axe said...

Most great people of this world, including the greatest Americans, were anti-American snobs. The only thing that ICE should ever care about is that incident in New Hampshire.

The Real Shliach said...

Dovid: they've had great teams? The clippers? Surely you must be confusing them with the other basketball team that plays in Staples Center. They will never, I repeat never, be a championship team.

CA: New Hampshire?

Crawling Axe said...

A state north of MA. You know, “live free or die”? White Mountains? Libertarians?

The Real Shliach said...

Yes, and what do they have to do with the ICE?

Dovid said...

TRS- Ok but they've had good teams, playoff teams. If Sterling sells the team they can. And if he doesn't, hey no worries, the lakers aren't going anywhere.
I don't know if you have loyalties in basketball, but if you do, I would point out that the team with the second worst record in the league comes from Minnesota.

The Real Shliach said...

Playoff team in the NBA does not equal good team. There are 30 teams in the NBA. There are 16 playoff teams in the NBA. Being good has nothing to do with being a playoff team. Heck, the first couple seasons the Timberwolves made the playoffs, they were under .500!

The Lakers, the defending NBA champions, are not going anywhere? I think a berth in the Western Conference Finals is the least to be expected.

What part of "National Boring Association" did you not get?College basketball, on the other hand (as long as we're not talking the ACC or Big 12) has potential...

Dovid said...

1. Thats what I'm saying, the Lakers aren't going anywhere, as in LA will still have a championship team.
2. I got it, I got it. I never got into college basketball before my tv watching days were up, so unfortunately I'm a fish out water when I hear of the exciting stuff that goes on there. But why would college be more exciting than the NBA? Especially now with the one and done situation, how can you even familiarize yourself with any of the best players. They're gone after a year.

The Real Shliach said...

1. You never know-where do you think the Lakers got their name from?

2. Well, true, but the first round of the NCAA tourney is one of the great spectacles in sports.

Dovid said...

1. haha, forgot about that!
2. well maybe one day I'll get into it, but even through my four years at UCLA, I never paid any attention to it. I remember whenever USC would play UCLA, they would put a box over the bear statue because the USC people would deface it every year.

The Real Shliach said...

And thus the conversation endeth?

Crawling Axe said...

You guys just proved my point better than I could have.

American sports are boring. They are all about statistics.

I know! They are more like horse raises.

Crawling Axe said...

races?

The Real Shliach said...

Dang, I was going to call you out on that one. Regardless, when did we ever mention any statistics? Besides, I don't hear you complaining about 1972.

Crawling Axe said...

Why should I complain about Watergate?

The Real Shliach said...

http://espn.go.com/classic/s/Classic_1972_usa_ussr_gold_medal_hoop.html

Crawling Axe said...

See, sport is all about politics and teams for you people. I can watch a soccer match, without caring who is playing.

Unless it's Real Madrid, of course. Then I want the bastards to be destroyed.

Dovid said...

lol. Why is real madrid hated so?

The Real Shliach said...

Without backstory sports is boring-you might just as well watch a high school ping pong match. Without pride, sports is worthless. And don't give me garbage about the beauty of the game-that's just garbage.

Crawling Axe said...

I agree it's garbage. There is no beauty of the game. There is sweat, blood, competitiveness and testosterone. But there is intelligent testosterone and non-intelligent. Associating myself with a group of strange men because they happen to live in the same city as me is not intelligent. Enjoying a game is giving in to testosterone just enough.

Crawling Axe said...

I can enjoy a high school soccer match just as much as Chelsey—MU match. If they play equally well.

As I said, horse races. $50 on the Funny Nose.

The Real Shliach said...

Correct. All following of sports is a ridiculous waste of time. However, there is intelligent waste of time and stupid waste of time. Baseball is intelligent waste of time. Soccer is not.

Lately MU have not been playing very well.

What's wrong with horse racing?

Crawling Axe said...

Following any sport is stupid. Watching any sport is bittul Torah. But if you're already going to do bittul Torah, do it for an exciting sport.

The Real Shliach said...

Which is exactly why you should waste time on baseball and not on soccer.

Crawling Axe said...

Let me leave you with one final thought. Most of the people who made this country great enjoyed soccer. (Whom am I talking about? Immigrants, of course.)

The Real Shliach said...

And yet all their descendants, who actually knew how to speak english, didn't enjoy it.

Crawling Axe said...

Nature rests on the children of the great.

The Real Shliach said...

Profound yet meaningless. Kind of like soccer, only more profound.

Anonymous said...

Who is asking you to be an athlete?

Baseball is all about brains and brawn-soccer is about making broad generalizations to win a pointless argument.

Profound yet meaningless. Kind of like soccer, only more profound.
lol
where would you place this sport of words?

The Real Shliach said...

Certainly above soccer.

Crawling Axe said...

Furthermore, koching in sports is not chassidish. So, if a sport requires you to koch in it (follow the statistics of certain players, etc.) in order to enjoy it, since on the face value, there is no action going on, the sport itself is not chassidish. And since chassidishkeit is a measure of perfection of all things... well, there you go.

The Real Shliach said...

Comments that come more than four weeks after the last comment were posted are the ravings of a deranged mad man.

Crawling Axe said...

Nice.

e said...

is that "deranged, mad man," "deranged mad man," or "deranged madman"?

The Real Shliach said...

The middle one.

Dovid said...

deranged? perhaps. But a mad man? hardly!

The Real Shliach said...

Why not, are you jealous that he's encroaching on your territory?

Dovid said...

No I'm not concerned about that at all. I reserve "mad man" for people that enjoy soccer more that baseball, basketball, and football.

Dovid said...

oh wait...

The Real Shliach said...

Ha!

Crawling Axe said...

I've been taught that ad hominem attacks are a sign of a lack of what to say on the subject.

The Real Shliach said...

All right, I'll take up the challenge- I'll write a post on it.

Crawling Axe said...

Ha! The feedforward cycle of narishkeit continues.